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24 February 2009 @ 07:23 pm
Thump. Thump. Thump.  
It's strange and ironic the way things turn out.

I should be researching my topic on the ecstacy of St. Teresa.
But I'm scared right now.

Questions like:
Is there a hypothetical dead end to my situation?
Can there be one relinquished with confidence?

Argentina won't happen for another year.
And in fact, I've got to do a lot of paperwork for this.

But I can't get away with getting an apartment, getting a car, and getting away from the United States as well.
I have to do things one at a time.

Independence comes very hard. Very hard. Especially if you're not privileged with the blessings of a wealthy family.

And things with Matt are amazing.
Although he's a bit sour right now in the shower, I'm confused as to what he's thinking.
My heart was racing, as I got off the phone with my Aunt about some loans, and had to think that he's here with me too. Going through this as well. And even though finding a job is probably one of the hardest goals for him, I have faith in him.
But what point does it have if I'm just going to go back to bullhead.

I'll be 21 with curfews and limitations.
And that my friends is sorrier than being 30 still living with your mom.

I'm scared.
Current Mood: scaredscared